Sunday, March 2, 2008

" Should we pity men whose wives is over 90 kg? "

I read this discussion thread posted in STOMP with disgust. This is outright discrimination!!!

That person said that he is concerned for his friend as he finds his friend's wife fat and ugly. He wonders if he should pity his friend and whether he will have any intimate satisfactory with his wife…

Honestly, being a fat girl myself, it hurts to read something like that. He is not even the husband, then he is there commenting how ugly and fat is somebody’s wife. Should someone like him , I do think he has malicious intention, be considered as a friend, guys? I know guys are visual animals and looks are very important to them, but never expect them, especially Singapore guys, to be so superficial.

I mean what are Singaporean guys expecting? All girlfriends and wives to have super models body or looked anorexic? Come on lah, if we do have this kind of looks, do you think we will stick with you, pea-brained superficial Singapore guys who don’t know how to respect others?

I acknowledged fat girls, especially if we are obese, do have a problem with our weight and it is best that we lost some weight to be healthier. Does he and many more people out there have to be so cruel to us by judging and hurting us with remarks like that?

Like I mentioned previously, a lot of things are not easy for us fat girls as we have a lot of stereotypes to fight. Among them, dating is the hardest. I thought about it before. It is not easy for us to find that special someone who can look beyond the physical appearance. Even if he does and he wants to be with you, he needs to pass the public acceptance test. That I feel is a killer and most guys just withdrawed because of public perception and peer pressure.

Ever wondered how it is like to be fat? People stared at you constantly when you are out because of your unusual size. Some polite ones might just stare, but most of them would point finger at you and even rudely pass some unkind remarks. Imagine, you are the guy having to hold the hands of this girl and walk around town … Can you take this kind of stress? Constantly having to be judge by people and some might even labelled you as strange. Can you take it?

Honestly, even for me as a fat girl, I don’t think I can take that kind of stress. I can easily ignore daily stares from people at me as I am already used to it, but I cannot stand people staring at me as a couple with a normal sized guy. I don’t think I can stand people’s stare and finger-pointing as if questioning the authenticity of the relationship. Thus, I wondered and questioned how many guys can take that kind of stress?

Of course, there are some guys who chose to be with the one he loves and ignored how others would view him. I admired (not that way) their guts and applause for them for being so courageous and love who they love and heck cares the rest. However, they are rare catch and minority out of the guys’ population.

Take a step back, I wonder if he is jealous that his friend and his wife beaming with happiness and can’t find a reason of their unison. I would advise him to go look for his own happiness and stop pitying others, for all you know, he pities you for being so superficial… (That is if you can read and understand what I am writing…: P)

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