Saturday, May 8, 2010

Fight Unhealthy Obsession With Another Obsession

I need a change of routine. I am too stressed out. I think I am developing an unhealthy obsession with studies that it affects my emotional well-being. My face break-out recently. I never had that before throughout my life. It has always been smooth and clear. I am not sure how to salvage it.

School also devastated me recently that I could not bring myself to be happy. I shall not detailed what had happened as I am still sore to write about it. I just want to say – hesitation is one’s biggest obstacles to success…All topics are equal, but some are more equal than others. Take it by all means, but make sure you have got what it takes to develop it (which I seriously doubt so). I am trying very hard to convince myself that it was God’s will and that it might not be that bad afterall. (Praying hard and key word is “convince”…)

I want to break-free! I need to transfer some of that obsession to something else. Influenced by the TV show – Escape to River Cottage by Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall , I tried my hands at gardening. For the benefit of those who do not know who he is, watch the video below. My brother and I are currently quite “obsessed” with the show “Escape to River Cottage” and “River Cottage Autumn”, which are showing on Asian Food Channel.

Not that I have a garden (I wished I had), but I am keen to grow some herbs outside the corridor. I had ginger and pandan leaves growing now. They hardly need any effort from us, just water regularly and occasionally top up some soil, mother nature just take care of everything else. They have grown so well.

Recently, I also planted some tomatoes, dill, chilli from seeds and they sprouted days ago. I was so delighted seeing those little pair of leaves appearing from the soil. They have made my day~! I haven’t been so happy. I hope they will grow into mature plants.

However, I need to remind my mum to be gentle when watering them. Not that I want to complaint, but she often drowned the seedlings with water-fall like motion of rice water. Which seedlings can survive that kind of tsunami?

Encouraged by the growth of young seedlings, I sowed corn, chives, sweet marjoram, garlic and Japanese cucumber yesterday. I hope to see shoots soon.

If only they allow us to rear chicken in HDB, I would have got myself some chicks. For now, I guess I have to work harder or to secure a windfall from Singapore Tote Board, so that I can buy a piece of land somewhere remotely in Singapore to fulfill my farming dreams.

In the meantime, I shall continue with my “Always look on the bright side of life” therapy. My dear friend send me the lyrics to encourage me earlier on. It was exactly how I felt – life just bullying me again…

Can’t help to go into school mode after watching this video. There is reference of Christ in the video. There are “cross” which we often associate with Christ. Secondly, those people are posed in the crucifiction position. Although they are dressed in various style, but they all look like various incarnation of Jesus. It is almost like Jesus preaching to you to look on the bright side, I must say. Instead of feeling pity for them, there is a sense of magnificent and peace when the camera pan to show the row of crosses on the plain.

Lyrics of Always Look on The Bright Side of Life

Cheer up, Brian. You know what they say.

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad.
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle,
Don't grumble, give a wistle!
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

(the music fades into the song)
...always look on the bright side of life!
Always look on the bright side of life…

If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten!
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing,
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps,
Just purse your lips and whistle -- that's the thing!

And... always look on the bright side of life...
Come on!
(other start to join in)
Always look on the bright side of life...

For life is quite absurd,
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow!
Forget about your sin -- give the audience a grin,
Enjoy it -- it's the last chance anyhow!

So always look on the bright side of death!
Just before you draw your terminal breath.

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true,
You'll see it's all a show,
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you!

And always look on the bright side of life
Always look on the bright side of life

*Feeling better already…


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